demisemidemon | (no subject)

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Ambriel and Teresa met. Clare knows this because she felt it at the time. It's hard to miss two such strong auras, even if she weren't already attuned to pay attention to them, and she is. She knew the moment they focused on each other in proximity.

(Also because Teresa mentioned it. But that was later, and brief. Clare and Teresa don't talk a lot; they've never needed to.)

But she was talking to a human, and the conversation kept going, and Clare didn't know how to break it off. She'd have just left if either Ambriel or Teresa's aura had flared with stress or anger or threat or any other sign of things going poorly -- but they didn't, and then they parted ways.

Teresa seemed pleased, though. So it's okay.

But when she senses Ambriel's aura coming out of the bar, Clare rises from the forest floor, and heads that way.

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"Are you saying that if you did leave, the Organization would try to have you killed?"

For the organization, as for Yoda, there is no try.

(At least, not insofar as Clare's currently aware.)

Ambriel's sudden shift of mood is obvious, on her face and in her aura. Clare is less surprised than she might have been some time ago; Ambriel is her friend now, and Raki has reminded Clare of some things, and so in their way did Sid and Galk, and Elena's death. Friends care about each other.

But this, too, is a fact of the world.

"Yes."

"We're half-monster," she tries to explain. "Humans are frightened by us. One of the ways we earn their trust is that there are rules the organization warriors are bound by. And there are no half-yoma warriors who don't belong to the organization."

In part because they're mostly bought as orphaned children to be made into warriors. None of this complicated 'recruitment' business here.

Clare doesn't sound as if this is something she deeply believes, or a justification that gives meaning to her life. But she does sound as if she considers all of this to be basic facts of the world. Because she does.

Ambriel puts both hands on Clare's shoulders. "You belong to no one but yourself."

And then, after a moment to recompose- "I do not understand everything about your world, and I cannot influence it unduly. But if you ever want to leave this organization, please tell me. Milliways allows us to cross worlds. I would help you, if you would let me. Or I would take you somewhere else."

Philosophy like this is not really something Clare has a lot of practice with.

You belong to yourself, reject these choices and substitute your own -- the organization doesn't teach that, for sure. The life of a traumatized battered orphan didn't. Teresa did, in her way, but then she died of it.

She stares back at her friend, uncertain and touched and confused.

"Okay," she says.

It sounds uncertain, too.

"I've never thought about it."

She doesn't trust the organization. She never has. But that's never been the point.

"I have a purpose in fighting for them. That's why I went to them to start with."

"I know. And I would never want to devalue your decisions. You have the free will to make your own choices. But know that you have more than one option."

Especially if that option is 'fight my own friends and/or die'.

They wouldn't likely send her friends after her, if they didn't need to. That might lead to qualms of loyalty.

Anyway, Clare doesn't have any living friends in the organization right now. Moot point!

"I know I do," she says -- trying to be reassuring, though she's still hitting uncertain more than anything else.

Clare's always had more than one option, but most of her options have always been choices of various ways to die.

"I'll remember."

She tries a very small smile, though Clare's face doesn't have a lot of practice at that. "You don't need to worry about me, Ambriel."

"I don't need to. Nor do I want to worry about you. But I can, so I do. Both your task and your world are dangerous, and you are my friend."

One of the few that Ambriel has here. Nor can the angel help her in any significant way. Thus, the worrying.

I can, so I do. That does make sense to Clare. You can, and you want to, so you do something and deal with what follows -- that's the only freedom everybody has.

"All right."

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